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As the kids head back to school and the days head towards Fall (although the temperatures are still hotter than Hades): I look back upon the Summer and wonder – “What happened?”

You see, I had plans.  We were going to take a family vacation up to the NC mountains. I was going to take time off from blogging to reorganize and clean out our home office, rest, read, and do some quiet contemplating with God.  It was my hope that while cleaning out my office I would clean our my heart and soul and determine what God wanted me to do in the next season of my life.

You see, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do anymore.  Did I want to continue to blog?  Was what I had to say helping anyone?   Did I have more to say and offer as a Christian approach to surviving and thriving medical mayhem?  Did I even have time to blog especially since it’s become a full time job just taking care of both mine and my husband’s aging bodies?   Was God wanting me to close this chapter in my life or continue to pursue it?

While, I did manage to get the office done, the rest of the plans were thwarted. No vacation, no rest and no contemplation.    Florida felt like hades, and the devil has been having a field day.

Thad’s infection and hemorrhaging from his shoulder had mostly resolved but his right arm has limited mobility.  Along with the neuropathy in his feet, he has not gone back to driving.  Because his body hemorrhaged when he was placed on Plavix in preparation for his cardiac stents he had to have open heart surgery instead.  Since then the incision has had several infections leading the surgeon and the infection disease doctor to think that his body was rejecting the stitches. Three rounds of various high dose antibiotics were administered.   Cardiac Rehab was delayed and when he was finally able to begin, on his fourth visit his heart rate plummeted requiring an admission to the hospital through the emergency room.  The working diagnosis is that his latest antibiotic along with his blood pressure medicine and Lasix caused the low heart rate.  All such drugs have been discontinued and his infection seems to be resolving slowly without aid of medicine.  Yay!  He is sporting a heart monitor for two weeks in case he needs a pace maker.  I told the doctor we already have a pacemaker in the family (mine) and I’ve replaced a number of his shirts with Magna Ready shirts to help with him being able to dress himself.   A pacemaker would definitely put a damper on using those shirts.  Check out https://magnaready.com/ for adaptive clothing.  Thad is remarkable in his spirit despite the ravages of his body.

During this time our dog started having urinary issues and her diet was changed in hopes it would resolve.  After a month with no changes, they operated and removed 15 kidney stones and a plethora of crystals that made her insides look like a snow globe!  She spent two weeks in pain, and drugged into oblivion with antibiotic, anti-inflammatories and pain meds.  Poor Baby!

Meanwhile, I was experiencing no pain for the first time in two years.  A Cortisone injection, and physical therapy had quieted my back, IT bands and feet and I was basking in it.  I was counting my blessings because I was the chauffeur, chef and general caregiver for both Thad and Liesl.

But about 10:30 pm the night Thad was in the hospital I went to check that the front door was indeed locked (it was) and tripped over the two desk chair mats I hadn’t had a chance to put in the office.  Between the dining room and the front door I went “Splat!” on the tile floor.  How I managed to get up (which I find difficult under normal circumstances) can only be explained that God “lifted” me off the floor. The pain was excruciating and I was sure that I had broken my right hip, would need surgery and both Thad and I would end up side by side in a room in a Rehab Center.  The verse that kept me calm was Psalm 28:7  “The Lord is my strength and shield.  My heart trusts in Him and I am helped.”  I made it to the phone by clutching chairs, furniture, and countertops and called Francesca and Rich.  Rich took our still drugged dog, her medicines, and her bed to their home and Francesca took me to the Emergency Room.  X-rays, thank you, Jesus, showed no broken bones.

As I write this, Thad, the dog and I are doing better.  While we still don’t know all of Thad’s results, he feels less tired.  Liesl has returned to her spunky, energetic and mischievous self.  And I am off a walker, and the cane.  While I still have some pain upon bending over and sitting; I am able to ambulate and drive.  Answered prayers.

I am grateful.  I am now sitting down to contemplate and interpret all that has happened this summer.  Was it what I expected or planned?  Certainly not.  I did not prepare for this season of pain, uncertainty and fear.  And while I did pray to God and seek Him; it was while this was all going on.  In other words, I did not prepare by staying in the word, taking daily time to read, and listening to God.  I was too busy with my own agenda.  I needed to be grounded in the word not just when the season is difficult  but also in the seasons of plenty.  What I did learn was that through this mayhem that all that has happened and will happen is not uncommon for mankind.

Nevertheless, God was there. He helped me off the floor that night I tripped.   He helped us with our daughter who came and took me to the ER and then spent the night with me to insure I could ambulate and not be alone.  He was there through our son-in-love who took care of a sick dog while caring for their kids, and picked Thad up from the hospital when I could not. He helped us with good physicians, and good neighbors who kept in contact with us and brought us a meal or two.

2 Corinthians 4:16 tells us “Even if our bodies are breaking down on the outside, the person we are on the inside is being renewed every day.”  I thank Him for being with us and in us through these seasons and I ask Him to help me become a new creation “Create in me a pure heart, oh Lord, and renew a steadfast spirit within me”   Psalm 51:10

God is faithful, and he will not let us suffer beyond our ability.  He will also provide a way through whatever is happening in our lives.  1 Cor 10:13.

As I come back from this sabbatical all that has transpired has helped me realize that no matter what is happening to our bodies, our lives show the presence of God working in us and God’s power to help us move even in the face of fear. Surely all this medical mayhem has a purpose.  All that I learned cannot be in vain and must be shared. It has propelled me to continue to blog.

It is my prayer that the Lord’s words nest in my heart and soul and then disseminate like seeds to be planted and grown in others in His time.

So I will continue not on my own strength but on God’s.  I  will trust God has a purpose for all that is my life. I will not be frozen in time, nor  look downward or over my shoulder but will trust that what is needed will come in God’s time and all I need to do is to look ahead, following Christ who leads us.

Oh, and maybe I will plan less and pray more.

Thank you for reading my post.  If you have found it encouraging please consider liking, commenting or sharing it.  Feel free to even re-blog – may these words take flight!

I have additional insights I’d love to share with you found in the pages of my debut book: Surviving Medical Mayhem – Laughing When It Hurts.  To order a copy or learn more go to my website at www.lorettaschoen.com

Blessings for Health & Wellness.