When My Pilot Light Goes Out

Here I am supposedly a seasoned survivor of medical adversity, a guide on how to navigate the medical industry and the “Pu-Ba” of all things medical.

I made sure that when I moved from South Florida to Central Florida that I researched and sought out physicians and health care practices that I would need to maintain this aging, sagging, 63 year body into what I hope would see me through to enjoy my grandchildren for many years to come.  Friends, it was no small task as that meant not only establishing myself with a GP but a sleep specialist (I have sleep apnea), cardiologist, gynecologist and oncologist.  And soon a urologist as my bladder seems to hold less and demand more.    TMI?  Okay.

To that end, I followed my own advice and sought an oncologist so that I could get a prescription for my yearly mammogram and ultrasound.  This stove was cooking on all four burners!

I have been breast cancer free since 2004.  Yippee!  I don’t fret too much these days and know that although I have an increased chance of a reoccurrence, I rest assured that with God’s guidance and my due diligence all would and will work out.

The radiology center was organized, the staff kind and friendly, they give you a nice tote for your clothes and they even had cookies and coffee.  Yum!

As was the norm, I had to wait to make sure the films were good.  What wasn’t the norm was calling me back to take a few more pictures. Then more waiting.  At this point, my antenna was up like a periscope on a submarine.  But, I reminded myself that this had happen before and it turned out to be nothing.  When the radiology technician finally came back she said that I could go but “there is a finding on your mammogram that needs to be compared to previous mammograms for comparison.”

And that’s when I realized that I had NOT been cooking with all four burners.  I forgot to have my medical records sent from my former Radiology Women’s Center in South Florida to the new one in Central Florida. While I keep my own copies of the written reports, they needed the actual films to compare.  This would have relieved me from having to wait for discernment, determination and diagnosis.

At my age, sometimes the pilot light that is my brain goes dim and sometimes it just plain goes out.  Somewhere between “Pu-Ba” and survivor the pilot light on this stove went out.

So now we wait.  Not being the most patient person and one that likes to explore all the possibilities this is the hardest part.  I’m a doer, not a waiter.  So what can I do?

1) Don’t beat myself up because at my age, it’s perfectly normal that the pilot light that is my brain may go dim occasionally.

2) Don’t ever let your guard down or become complacent just because you think you’re healthy.

3) Don’t let things get so routine that you are on auto pilot.

4) Make a checklist of things that need doing for new visits whether for a doctor or test center.  This will help the memory issue.

5) Be grateful that the radiologist is being cautious not only as a new patient but one that has a strong family history of breast cancer.

6) Remind myself that I have experience in this regard and can utilize the knowledge I know to help me go through this process.

7) Remind myself that I am not alone.  Good family support and God are right there beside me.

8) Seize the day and not let what “might be” ruin my days or my sleep at night. There is too much living to do, too much loving to pour on the grand kids and too much faith not to place it where it belongs – In God’s Hands.

Ok, I’ve re-lit the pilot light.

p.s. Test results were negative for suspicious breast lumps.  Praise the Lord!


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