Don’t Say This to Your Doctor
The good Lord has blessed me with experience in the medical field from as early as 9 months of age when I had to “sport” heavy, iron braces to correct “elongated tendons in my feet and legs”. I helped with the care of my dad as his heart began to fail long before the first heart transplant was perfected. And later on got one of my first jobs as a lab tech in a university science lab which in turn led me to becoming a medical secretary at Duke Hospital. Throw in the myriad of “training” I received surviving my mothers, mother-in-law’s, husband and my medical mayhem and my experience is vast. Or so I thought.
Recently Thad and I got the Covid-19 virus ten days after his shoulder surgery. His internist put him on Paxlovid and it was remarkable how it reduced his symptoms. Four days later, I came down with Covid as well. But when I called my internist she refused to put me on Paxlovid and insisted I come in to see her. Since I suffered greatly with my first round of Covid, I really wanted the Paxlovid to avoid the same fate. I explained that I had read all the information on the drug and that if I cut my blood thinner dose in half I could take it. But no amount of pressuring her would change her mind. Instead she gave me 3 other medicines and ushered me out of the office as it was close to 5 O’clock. I was fuming! Afterall, I had done my research!
On the last day of Thad’s Paxlovid medication, Thad woke up in a pool of blood that took almost four hours to stop the flow. Why? Because in an effort to prevent embolism following surgery the surgeon had rightly placed him on high dose aspirin (blood thinner) which along with the Paxlovid the internist prescribed caused him to bleed through his incision.
Needless to say, my friends, I owed my internist a big apology. And I did. I climbed down off my high and mighty horse and told her how foolish I was and that in fact I had a great respect for her in sticking to her decision. While her delivery may have been less than desirable, her care was spot on. No matter how much experience and education we as healthcare consumers have we are not an authority on every medical subject. In fact, isn’t that why we go to doctors? Because they are.
This got me to thinking of other behaviors or verbiage we fling out to our healthcare professionals and I thought I would share some things you should NOT say.
And here is the first one that ties into my story:
Don’t demand a specific treatment or medication. While you may want a particular treatment or medication always consider the doctors expertise and knowledge. Medical care is a collaborative effort.
Don’t say “I read this on the internet” We all love Dr. Google but realize that everybody and anybody puts information on the internet – some of which is not factual. Use the internet for basic information only and realize that God made everyone unique and therefore what is good for one person may not be good for you. Too much surfing the internet may find you having a panic attack for no reason. Always verify what you have read with what your doctor finds. Physicians use symptoms, family history, your medications and current lifestyle to determine a diagnosis. If you want to learn good, basic medical information check out https://www.webmd.com/, https://www.mdanderson.org/ , https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions .
Don’t lie about your medical history or current symptoms. If you drink, smoke, do recreational drugs it is important to disclose the facts as accurately as possible. If you took an antibiotic that was your spouses in attempt to avoid an office visit, be honest and relay this information regardless of how embarrassed you may feel.
Don’t down play your symptoms. Avoid phrases like “It might be in my head” . Or if you have headaches and say “But I might be anxious or it might be stress related”. Stick to the facts or symptoms and allow the doctor to gather the necessary information to formulate a hypothesis.
DON’T say: “I’m sorry I wasted your time.”
It’s your doctor’s job to take care of you, and there’s nothing wrong with leaving a checkup—or even the emergency room—with a relatively clean bill of health. If something doesn’t feel right, get it checked out. It’s better to go to the ER with chest pain and find out it was heartburn than to stay home and have a heart attack.
Don’t say things that are condescending loud, hostile or sarcastic. Realize that doctors are human beings and can make mistakes. Abusive behavior does nothing to provide good quality of care.
DON’T say: “Surely you’ve heard of…”
It’s totally fine to come to your appointment armed with questions about a new study you read about, but don’t assume your doctor knows every written article about a particular subject. If you want to discuss an article you read, take a moment to print it out and bring it to your appointment. Heard about a new drug that just hit the market? Bring along a one-page write-up about it (copy and paste from the Internet—you don’t have to write it yourself).
DON’T say: “Aren’t you the expert?”
While doctors probably have more medical information than you do they are only human. There is a balance between blind faith and being an active participant in your health care. If what your doctor prescribes a regiment you know you won’t follow speak up ASAP. Healthcare professionals deserve your respect but they should respect you as well.
Don’t dismiss the doctor’s advice without a valid reason. Again, there is a balance between utilizing the expertise of the doctor and your concerns or questions about the recommended treatment plan.
In summary
- Come prepared with your medical history, list of medications, and questions you may have.
- Be honest, detailed and accurate. State the facts honestly, without opinions or embellishments.
- Ask Questions. If the answer is not clear to you, ask them to clarify or speak in plain English and not medical speak. Repeat their answers to insure that they have conveyed the information clearly and that you understand it.
- Work as a team. Your doctor has the medical knowledge but no one knows your body as well as you do. Being an active participant ensures the best outcome.
Sources:
https://www.hcplive.com/view/the-10-worst-things-patients-can-say-to-physicians
https://www.prevention.com/health/a20499524/5-things-to-never-say-to-your-doctor/
Thank you for reading my post. If you have found it encouraging please
consider liking, commenting or sharing it. Feel free to even re-blog – may these words take flight!
I have additional insights I’d love to share with you found in the pages of my debut book: Surviving Medical Mayhem – Laughing When It Hurts. To order a copy or learn more go to my website at www.lorettaschoen.com
Blessings for Health & Wellness.