Surprise, Surrender and Serenity
It started out as any morning. Thad and I stumble out of bed and assess the condition of our bodies. I am bent over with lower back and hip pain which is radiating down to my left knee. I look and feel well beyond my soon-to-be seventy years of age. There is going to have to be a whole lot of war paint (make up), nice clothing (Queen Ester’s apparel) and prayers (armor of Christ) to create the illusion that “I’m fine”.
I drag myself into the bathroom where I find my betrothed leaning over his sink staring down at himself and immediately sense that all is not well. When I ask how he is he rises up straight and in the reflection of the mirror I see a massive hematoma (blood coagulation under his right shoulder navigating down his arm.
After seven weeks on a blood thinner (Plavix) in preparation for a stent procedure which was to take place 6 days later, his body for the second time has hemorrhaged internally from the site where he has had surgery twice to remove a massive infection and replace his shoulder.
To say we were surprised was an understatement. We were devastated, disappointed to say the least and scratching our heads as to why? “Why, Lord?” We were so close to having the stent procedure which would relieve Thad from his tiredness, dizziness and shortness of breath. We knew that the less invasive procedure was now no longer viable and a coronary artery bypass procedure was in his future.
Phone calls to cancel the days plans and more calls to inform the cardiology and make an appointment with the cardiologist and the cardiac surgeon left us anxious about the future. Fear of the unknown was rearing its ugly head and left to run amok, we knew that the devil would surely be playing on our playground.
Once we had done all that we could, we had time to “sit a spell” and ponder. And that’s when we were able to take it out of our realm of this life and into the Lord’s.
We exercised our faith by reading God’s word which reminded us that “despite the rains and floods and wind that blew against the house, it did not fall for it was founded on the rock”. Matthew 7:25. We listen to the day’s sermon and listened to the music which seemed to have been crafted especially for our ears.
Later, sitting on our newly built outdoor paver patio we began to not only see the beauty of the preserve that surrounds our home but how God had a message for what was happening.
We found ourselves asking for God to give us wisdom and strength to overcome our disappointment and fear and see the purpose in this development and He did not disappoint. Isaiah tells us that beauty can be created from the ashes of our lives. Over the next few days and the visit with the cardiologist we were to see God’s hand in this.
If the stent procedure to be successful Thad would need to remain on the Plavix for at least six months to prevent the artery and new stents to remain open. If he bled after this procedure, they would not be able to discontinue the Plavix because to do so would threatened clots and he could die. Therefore, He would continue to bleed. Doing the cardiac bypass would only require Heparin prior and during the operation. While certainly more invasive, it is a safer method to secure the best results for a long life. Cardiac bypass would also avail the surgeon to better see if there was any other issues taking place.
Isaiah tells us to ‘Be strong, do not fear, your God will come’. Therefore, Thad and I will trust NOT in ourselves but in God. We will prepare as best as we can armed with armor of Christ and then surrender to God and rest in His serene embrace.
Are you experiencing medical mayhem in your life right now? Do you find yourself at a crossroad in decisions? While you reach for medical solutions, reach for Jesus first and lay it all on His shoulders. Pour out your fears, frustrations, wishes and prayers. Then crawl into his lap and let His arms embrace you and just listen for His voice.
My prayer and wishes for you is that you know without a shadow of doubt that you are a beloved child of God. May you rest in His peace as your journey through this season of unrest. I will be praying for you.
Thank you for reading my post. If you have found it encouraging please consider liking, commenting or sharing it. Feel free to even re-blog – may these words take flight!
I have additional insights I’d love to share with you found in the pages of my debut book: Surviving Medical Mayhem – Laughing When It Hurts. To order a copy or learn more go to my website at www.lorettaschoen.com
Blessings for Health & Wellness.